F.UK.U.P.s

(Frequently UnKnown Ungisperican Protocols)

Take off your shoes.
Even if you're just stopping by, even if they're a pain to remove, even if they're just so fabulous! Common courtesy. And it minimizes sheet displacement and other people plopping down on the space created. You'll find other lawn residents don't appreciate shoed trompage so it's a good idea to de-shoe as you enter the lawn.

Do not smoke on Ungisphere sheets.
Take it to the edge of the lawn or out of the park (or wherever it is still legal.) Also, just because Ungie doesn't see you, doesn't mean you can get away with it. You are *surrounded* by people who, if they object to your smoking, WILL COMPLAIN TO UNGIE!

Bring Rum.
It is a requirement for getting a daiquiri (though not a guarantee). While various people will tout them as "free" to convince their friends to join, they are a service arranged and *funded* by Ungie, and distributed at his discretion. If you need an appreciation of how much it costs to make 6-8 gallons of strawberry daiquiri mix try to make just a *pint* of strawberry smoothie and see how much you spend on just the strawberries. If you still think it unreasonable that you bring rum, try to freeze 6 gallons of liquid, cart it across the city to Bryant Park by 4:30 on Monday, and then serve it to 50 people... every week for 10 weeks straight. You don't have to bring rum every time, and you don't have to bring a whole lot of it, just enough to establish that you're not a presumptuous self-entitled free-loader. I recommend you buy a $10 bottle of Bacardi Gold, introduce yourself to Ungie, give it to him as a "contribution to the Ungisphere", then hope he likes you enough to offer you a daiquiri. If this is unacceptable/undoable you are welcome of come and *not* expect to get a daiquiri.

Do not step in or touch anything in the "kitchen".
The "kitchen" (bar) is an area of uncovered grass, near the middle of the 'Sphere, designated for prep and serving of drinks (e.g. daiquiris, sangria, etc.) Not only is unsanitary to tromp all over this area, but there are knives, corkscrews, wet patches, and LANDMINES strew about. Also, it is not public domain and you cannot just help yourself to someone else's stuff. I would have thought this goes without saying, but here we are.

Don't run afoul of Ungie.
... or Loren, or Noto, or John, too, but especially not Ungie. This is their show and everyone else is a guest. You don't have to be their friend or even like them, but you have to not piss them off. If you are not a friend of one of them you are a guest of a guest and your friend is responsible for your behavior. This is not some quirk of the Ungisphere, this is basic social protocol.

Don't bring a bunch of your friends and have a private party in a corner.
Come on now!

Ungisphere Primer